Prayer Will Change Your Motherhood

As a parenting and homeschooling coach, so many moms I deal with are looking for the “magic bullet” – the “thing” that will help their children be obedient, keep the home running smoothly, and take them from daily tears to enjoying their motherhood.  After we discuss the issues they’re dealing with in their home and work through some practical steps to implement, I often ask if they are praying daily.  Usually, the answer is no.  I remember when my answer was no.  And then I was challenged by a mom further down the road in motherhood to pray daily.  I know firsthand that prayer will change your motherhood. 

We live in a world where we have the ability to access an enormous amount of information instantly and search for the best (and usually the quickest) way to care for our homes, care for our children, and care for ourselves.  We read books, listen to podcasts, search Pinterest, like Instagram and Facebook accounts, and ask friends what they do in their homes to keep them running smoothly.

And while some of these ideas and practical tips are helpful, many moms that I coach are still struggling with creating a home that is well-managed and joyful.

The Most Effective Tool in Motherhood

The first and best practical tip I can give you for creating a happy home and a joyful motherhood is to commit to daily prayer.

It doesn’t matter how old a mom you are.  Whether you’re dealing with toddlers, young children, teenagers or grown/adult children, going to God, spending time giving Him your concerns, frustrations, and questions then listening to Him will give you the answers and peace you seek.

I have heard it said often that God allows controversies, difficulties, sadness, and worries in our life because sometimes that’s the only way to catch our attention – to feel like we need God.

We always need God but, in our self-sufficiency and busyness of the day we forget we are not alone and that everything doesn’t depend on us.  We forget we were created by a God who loves us and that HE would not give us these children and this home without also giving us His help.

I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. 

Phil 4:13

I can almost hear you say, “Oh, great, God will do the laundry”?

No, but he will give you the time to do the laundry.  He might also give you the inspiration to teach your children to do it themselves (Yes, 8 yr old’s can do their own laundry!)  God will take away your frustrations and stress that add to your feelings of overwhelm and anxiety.

But He can’t help if you don’t give it to Him first.  God respects our freedom – He never forces His love or His Spirit on us.  He offers it – we have the opportunity to accept.

Prayer and Mindset

There are systems and routines that are necessary to run a home, but the most important tool to a well-run home is our mindset.  Bringing God into your heart and day completely changes your mindset.

Once you begin a life a prayer, you see things you never saw in yourself, your family, and the way your home functions. You recognize that motherhood is a calling from God – He has called YOU for THESE children.  You understand that keeping a home can be a sacred privilege rather than monotonous drudgery.

Prayer will help you understand that God has put YOU and your husband in charge of your children – not your children in charge of you. 

You bring Him your frustrations and you ask the Holy Spirit for help.  And He does!  That’s the beauty of the Holy Spirit – small (sometimes loud and clear) prompts of what to do and how to do it.

And peace……

Starting your day with peace and the armor of the Holy Spirit from your prayer WILL change your motherhood.

But it must start with you.  Yes, God is prompting and calling you (you’ve read this far, right?), but He won’t force you.

How to Pray

Schedule it –

With anything in life, you must schedule it but be reasonable.  Don’t schedule prayer during a time when you know it would probably be impossible to keep the commitment.  Having said that, you’ll need to stretch yourself here to make prayer a priority.  There will be a thousand reasons that you think you don’t have time, or suddenly rather than pray you absolutely MUST do the laundry etc….(it’s amazing how important laundry becomes when we have to pray!)

First thing in the morning – this is the best time because it really sets your day off on the right foot.  Set your alarm clock a little earlier, get yourself ready for the day, grab a cup of coffee or tea and be quiet and in His presence. 

Make it a priority–

If you can’t do it before all the children get up, find the earliest time of the day when you know you’ll consistently have 15 minutes for prayer.  Maybe the first 15 minutes of school time after you get the kids off to school or working at home.  (If you homeschool and you think you can’t find 15 minutes when your children are quiet and not in need of you, then you need to double down and find that time.  Let the older children know this is nonnegotiable. 

We homeschooled seven children.  From 1 -3 PM every day we had nap/quiet/reading time depending on the age of the children.  This was when I went to my room, closed the door and talked, cried, and complained to God.  And always I felt his comfort, heard his peaceful encouragement, and ended my time of prayer thanking God for my beautiful children who tried my patience but expanded my heart.

When I first began praying, I was pregnant with my fourth child and the oldest was 4 ½.  Prayer time often had a little toddler or baby playing at my feet.  Give God the best time you can.  Don’t try to be perfect or you’ll quit.  God won’t be surprised it isn’t perfect….just that you have shown up the best you can.

Beginning to pray –

Recognize that you will be establishing a new habit.  It won’t be easy at first.  I know that if I stop eating sugar, I’ll lose weight.  But I have to stop eating sugar….and that’s hard.  Remember your why.  God has the peace and insight for your motherhood that you want.  He will give it to you if you show up.

Set the timer-

Really?  Yes, set a timer for 15 minutes to begin with, then when you’ve prayed every day for 15 minutes, add 5 more until 20 minutes feels comfortable.  And don’t leave until the timer goes off.  I can tell you that in my own life and in the lives of many of my friends, God leaves the golden nugget until the last few minutes of our prayer.

Bring the New Testament or a good spiritual book to help keep yourself directed and focused and a journal to write down inspirations.  (Here’s a list of good spiritual reading books that can help keep you focused.) Be careful you don’t spend more than a couple of minutes reading the material upon which to reflect.  Reading is not meditative prayer. 

How to get started-

You’re comfortable, you have a journal and/or book to help you keep focused, you’ve set your timer now relax.  Put yourself in His presence.  In your mind, imagine you are there at Jesus’ feet listening to His words.  Read a bit from the New Testament and put yourself in the scene. 

What is Jesus saying to you?

                How can you apply what Jesus is saying to your life?

                Ask the Holy Spirit to give you advice on how to proceed with a problem.

                “Give me, Lord, what you think I need to hear today.”

Then listen…..

You probably won’t hear God’s voice like thunder.  He prefers to whisper. 

Maybe the first day of prayer you won’t ‘hear’ anything.  Keep going back to Him.  He has all the answers.

What to do if you miss a day?  Go back the next day.  Prayer is not like a failed diet where we give up because we had the chocolate cake. Prayer is like the person who transforms their body because every day they began again.  You’re transforming your soul and your mindset and that takes time.

Here’s How Prayer Will Change Your Motherhood

You’ll find….

Interior peace

Outward calm

Patience

Empathy

Kindness

The ability to handle stress and anxiety better

A higher motive for the mundane in everyday life

Self-confidence

The realization that you are not alone

Answers and insights for struggles

A deeper knowledge of the life of Jesus Christ.

The opportunity to see your children as gifts rather than burdens

Practical ways to live your Christian faith in your everyday life.

The grace to progress in virtue and holiness

An inner joy that cannot be attained through any other means

Motherhood can make you go crazy or make you go to God.  Go to God.

Prayer will change your motherhood and it will change you.

Have a great week!

Janet

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