It’s kind of funny, and definitely ironic, that I’m writing posts on how to have a clean home and how a cleaning mindset affects your success. I remember like it was yesterday, sitting on the bed in my very messy room with my mom when I was about 11 and she was trying a ‘new approach’ to get me to be orderly and clean in my room.
She cried.
She told me how sad it made her feel that I was ok having the clean laundry stacked a mile high on my desk chair, how my shoes and socks were always strewn around on the floor – what was wrong with me that I couldn’t just open the closet door and set them in there??? She lamented that she couldn’t find the top of my dresser because there was so much junk on it. And make my bed? It usually happened just before dinner, if it happened at all.
Thank goodness my brothers and I were not allowed to eat in our room or I’m sure there’d be crumbs and dirty dishes in my bed!
She had set the schedule that on Saturdays I was to clean my room, vacuum my hot-pink long shag carpet (oh, the glorious ‘70’s!), change my sheets, dust all surfaces, and put everything away that had accumulated over the week on all flat surfaces and the floor.
Truth be told, I don’t remember much of the day-to-day struggle between my mom and me in keeping my room clean, but I do remember that day when my mother sat on the bed next to me, crying, and feeling like a failure because her only daughter was a slob. It wasn’t so much a new approach or tactic to make me change my ways, as much as it was a sadness and frustration.
Changing My Mindset
I felt terrible. I had let her down and disappointed her. I vowed that things would change, and they did! At the time, I don’t think I really knew why the switch had turned on – maybe it was maturity, but I think more than anything I had my “why”. I didn’t want to disappoint my mom. To see her cry and know I was responsible for her sadness was a feeling I didn’t want to experience.
I wish I could say that the clean, orderly switch stayed on forever. It didn’t, but more often than not, my room was clean. In college, my room was immaculate compared to other girls’ rooms!
When Michael and I married, we had a clean little apartment. (What I didn’t know at the time, was that the lack of THINGS contributed greatly to the order and cleanliness of the space! Keep that thought for another post 😉)
But when children started coming, I allowed myself to get overwhelmed, neglect routine habits, and I was back to my 11 yr old self.
Your Cleaning Mindset – Know Your Why
No matter what it is in life, understanding and defining our mindset is critical in meeting goals and achieving success. (Here’s a post on the importance of mindset.)
If you don’t think you could ever run a marathon, then you never will. And if you don’t think you’ll ever have a clean home, then you won’t.
And if you don’t CARE if you have a clean home, you certainly won’t.
Although, I can’t help you with the mindset, tools, training, and follow-through to run a marathon, I can help with how to keep a clean home. After 35 years of home-management, I’m finally confident in my abilities to say, “Mom, you didn’t fail me!”
So, What is Your why?
Here are some basic questions to ask yourself about your mindset regarding cleaning and keeping order. For a more comprehensive and detailed assessment, download my “Cleaning Mindset Assessment”.
- Is it important to me to have a clean, orderly home?
- Do I consider how a clean, orderly home contributes to the quality of life for those in our home?
- What role model have I had for how to keep a home?
- Do I use excuses for not keeping an orderly, clean home?
The First Step in Having a Clean Home
Want a clean home! Yes, that’s the very first step to have a clean, orderly home. If you don’t want it, you’ll never take the next steps to actually achieve it.
It’s really no different than if you want to run a marathon. The first step is to decide you’re going to do it.
After you’ve examined your thoughts about how you feel about cleaning and found your roadblocks and understood the benefits of a clean, orderly home, then you can begin the process of figuring out how to achieve it. I’ve managed our home now for 35 years and it IS like running a marathon sometimes.
I can’t say my home has been pin-perfect always, but I certainly see the improvement in mindset, skills, and atmosphere of the home as I have made home management my priority.
What Was My Mother Trying to Do?
I can say that my mom was not a failure! She was trying to instill in me the mindset of caring and being responsible for my surroundings, while having a positive attitude and experiencing the benefits of a clean, orderly bedroom.
Sometimes we are so accustomed to the chaos in our surroundings that we have no idea how freeing and stress-free we would feel if we didn’t have the chaos.
Choose your Cleaning Mindset
You are not a victim of your circumstances, unless you CHOOSE to be a victim. You can decide what kind of a home environment you want.
Actually, you have already decided what kind of home you want by the choices you’ve made up until now. But the good news about mindset and choices is that you can always change your mindset and make new choices!
Choose your mindset. Look at what has worked for you in the past, and what has not. Are you willing to make changes – one step at a time – to create a bright, cheerful, happy, STRESS-FREE home?
Download the “Cleaning Mindset Assessment” printable to help guide you through the process of creating a positive cleaning mindset. You’ll identify your why – which is critical in your motivation to keep a clean, orderly home. Without identifying and understanding your cleaning mindset, home management will always be a struggle with so many moments of failure. It doesn’t have to be that way!
Begin today! One step at a time take back control of your home environment. Create a bright and cheerful home that serves you and your family rather than stress out you and your family.
I promise it doesn’t take cleaning all day to make it happen! It’s about mindset, and the flip of a switch!
Hope you’re having a great week!
Janet
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